What is Crossdressing?

Below is a great read on how I feel I am, how being a cross dresser defines me, and how I approach the subject when asked. We should all know how to express our gift to the general public without hesitation. Once you know who you are, your confidence and knowledge that you are doing the right thing, for yourself, is empowering!

What Crossdressers Are Not
While the vast majority of crossdressers are ordinary heterosexual men with an additional feminine dimension, they are stereotyped by society based on a highly visible minority who crossdress for entirely different reasons. Drag queens are usually gay or bisexual males who don women’s clothes either to mock femininity and society’s stereotypes of gays, or to find sex partners. Female impersonators dress to entertain. Transsexuals believe they are entrapped in the body of the opposite sex, and seek sexual reassignment surgery.

Understanding the “Woman Within”
There is within each man a set of personality potentials that are part of his birthright, but that society labels as “feminine” and says he should suppress. Crossdressers have made contact with these potentials and found their expression fulfilling. Integrating these into their whole personalities, crossdressers are able to smooth off some of the macho rough edges programmed by their upbringing. The result is a happier, healthier whole person.

 

But Why Do They Crossdress?
Much speculation has centered on why some people crossdress. No one knows for sure. While some cite hormonal or genetic factors, others favor environmental factors.  Being coddled in early childhood, allowed to play dress up, or emulating mannerisms of a girl who is respected, early in life, could be factors. It appears that for many, the clothing serves as a “lens” to facilitate focusing upon and developing personality elements society has assigned to the opposite gender.


Is Crossdressing a Sexual Phenomenon?
Human being are sexual creatures. Early on, many crossdressers find the activity sexually stimulating. However, research shows the sexual factor tends to become less prominent over time. Crossdressing is more a matter of personality than sexuality. For many the need to crossdress becomes a part of the self, just as musicians need to play music, writers need to write, or ballplayers need to play ball. A life without crossgender expression is to some as tragic as the life of a musician forced to live without music. Like musical talent, crossgender expression can be a real gift.

What Types of People Crossdress?
Crossdressers come from all walks of life, races, creeds, and economic backgrounds. The phenomenon dates back many thousands of years. In some cultures, especially some Native American tribes, they were highly respected as shamans. Most crossdressers are well-educated and come from conventional family backgrounds. The vast majority are heterosexual and most are, or have been, married. Most are happy in their masculinity, and only a small percentage opt to live as women full time. A few women are crossdressers, but they are much less numerous than their male counterparts. Perhaps this is due to the relative latitude society grants to women in matters of dress and self-expression.

Can Crossdressing Be “Cured”?
The chief adjustment problem crossdressers face is societal attitudes. While these have been changing since crossdressers appeared on the Donahue Show in 1987, acceptance is far from complete. Because of possible consequences to families, jobs and friends, many crossdressers live shrouded in secrecy. Some crossdressers deny their feminine side and dispose of their clothing, only to return to crossdressing later, frustrated by the amputation of so significant a part of their personality. Some seek therapy, but as many therapists are not knowledgeable about crossgender issues, cross dressers sometimes find themselves educating the therapist rather than getting the help they seek. Nor are psychiatric drugs of benefit. There is no “cure” for crossdressing, and most crossdressers do not want one!

The Crossdresser and His Wife
How a crossdresser’s wife accepts him depends on his own degree of insight and personal maturity, the strength of their relationship, and the way in which she learns about the crossdressing. Discovering his secret can send her on an emotional roller coaster ride of anger, fear, denial and grief. She may feel it threatens her own femininity and the future of their relationship. Open and honest communication is vital here. Once a wife or partner realizes her mate isn’t leaving her for another man or for a new life as a woman, or taking risks that could destroy their financial and family life, the two of them can seek a balanced solution that suits their own unique needs and circumstances. Healing comes when the wife or partner realizes that her mate is the same person she has always known, recognizes the risk her man has taken in revealing his innermost feelings, and appreciates the trust this represents. Many of the traits that attracted her in the first place – sensitivity, kindness, appreciation of beauty, etc. – can now be seen as belonging to that “woman within.”

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Do you have the love in you?

You have to love,
to be in love,
to love that feeling,
to be happy and free….
…have you got that love in you?

Some of us express these feelings in our music.
What a great way to celebrate our feminine side!
I love to get out there on the dance floor in my heels and a skirt.
Something I do not usually do, which makes it all the more fun!

I just can’t stop smiling when I am in sync with my feminine side,
The positive energy one gets when experiencing a heavenly glee that surrounds your pampered side.
It’s a girly girl attitude that we can all use to enhance our everyday lives.
To get that attitude, we must look our best and be somewhat serious about our looks!

There’s no fooling around, wear sensual lingerie,
the kind of foundations and soft fabrics you would like to see on other girls.
Maybe a silk blouse, a tulip skirt, and pretty high heels.
Take the time to do your make-up…you can be so pretty if you try hard enough.

Make sure you have cute locks of flowing hair on your head,
accessorize with a barrette or a embellished headband.
Then there’s jewelry and perfume to complete the experience!

If you take the time, with a little effort, you can look better than some genetic girls in today’s society.
And that is the ultimate gleeful feeling, as your confidence soars and attitude rises to the point,
where you to are dancing in high heels and swinging in you flowing skirt!
Have fun and try to be a girl girl in everything you do, it can be a heavenly experience.

Because you are never fully dressed without a Smile!

cksmile

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What makes you feel so feminine and prissy??

Making love in lingerie is a real fun time for me!

Getting dolled up in front of the mirror!

Soaking in lavender bath oil beads and being totally shaven smooth is so feminine for me.

Remembering and reliving my youth…
I often went to bed dressed like this in new lingerie my Mom had bought for me!

I could not stop myself from being wet. Some things don’t change! *giggle* …glad they invented pads with wings! ♡

I love lounging in silk and satin lingerie!

I love (I really do!) to have my body contoured into a curvy feminine shape!
“Do you mind if I put on a Angora sweater and a pleated skirt before we go to the show?”

So my friends, care to share and be the feminine girl I know you are?!?!
I think you would love to come and play with me?

We could go to the girls room or the stores changing room and you could help me adjust my garter!
Let’s go shopping and “Play!!!!”

…so, what would you do to tickle my fancy if we went out together? Hmmmm???

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Are you a girly girl inside?

I don’t know about you, but for me, being a girly girl starts with a feeling inside you.

Being girly is almost a artful ambition, knowing colors look better if they are defined within a black border.
It’s a demeanor, being a bit passive, soft spoken…not too bold, flamboyant, and boisterous.
It’s possibly why we like to wear lite pink and pastel colors and dress ourselves in soft fabrics.

Being a girly girl, when you can…“and you know you want to”,
is a experience everyone should be able to enjoy…because it is a wonderful way to be!

Trying on lingerie, finding the slip that is so silky to the touch….
…the bra and panty set that fits you like a glove, and contours yourself into a feminine form you didn’t even know you could have!
The make-up that transforms your face into a flawless looking femme fatal ageless beauty….is that really me, in the mirror????

Being a girly girl is also about going through the motions…wearing those high heels that you always admired…“they’re sooo cute!”
Walking the walk….down the street and hearing yourself, heels “clicking on the sidewalk”
…and echoing against the buildings as people turn their heads to witness your coming out in a most feminine way possible!
It shouldn’t be scary for you,
because inside, your confidence shows, you know…you’re a girly girl!

And they all…want to be like you!

We all want the attention, the admiration, and envy…to be beautiful, stylish, a trend setter.
When you feel that girly girl inside you, remember to gather all your knowledge about those feminine past experiences…what worked for you, and what didn’t…
and put them into the forefront of your mind.
Become the confident girl you want to be, with all you senses of touch, feeling soft and luxurious.
Sight, looking feminine with makeup, lashes, hair, clothes…the works!
Smell, perfume and dainty flowery scents even if it’s deodorant, body splash, or fabric spray.
Even the smell of hair spray has been known to bring images to peoples minds of their Mothers and Sisters!
Sound, some of the most noticable feminine traits come from high heels, soft spoken tones, and dangling charms on a bracelet!

Embrace your inner Diva my friends, no matter what gender your God gave you!
Remember, you should be the person that dictates what you want to experience in your life!
After all, you are not breaking any laws here, you are just expressing your feminine self, that is inside you!
There is nothing wrong being a girly girl, feeling feminine, looking pretty, and having the admiration of others.
It is a human trait we all have and is something we all desire.
Fulfill you inner self and become the girly girl you want to be!
For an hour, a day, all weekend….stay inside, go out, or toast the town!
You will be surprised how far a little confidence will take you, the experience is breath taking and is very enjoyable, you will see.
Next time you get girly, take a few pictures and remember the moment, they will become your most memorable moments in your life…

…moments you will never forget!

 

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Mothers Day Reminiscing.

Thinking of my Mother this weekend and celebrating her spirit.

“Where would I be without you?”

“You taught me to walk and read and write and sing and skip and charm.
You gave me experience, encouragement, and acceptance when others didn’t.
Thank you for everything, I will always love you for eternity.”

If you have the chance to see your Mother today, do it!

Grab those memories when you can and you will have memories for the future.
If you have been reading my Blog, you kind of know I was allowed to explore, at a early age, what girls take for granted.
Developing as a young girl does,(due to medication for a baby illness)I suppose Mom understood, and helped me to be ready.
I don’t think my Father would allow anyone but me to make that future choice, as I was born just like his other siblings.
Mom sure would have made me into her daughter, (she thought) she would never have.

Mom allowed me to explore her “things”…I remember wearing a slip and Moms heels when I was about age 6.
My breasts were developing at age 9 and I got my own girly pre-teen undergarments.
Mom was there for me…at about 11 years old, she curled my long hair, bought me a dress and cute Mary Jane shoes.
She took me shopping, taught me to be civil and charming, and discrete.
She did all of this without actually acknowledging her involvement…girly things were just available, should I choose to walk that path.

During my teen years, Mom would shield me from ridicule and shame from my feminine appearance, at home and school.
Her smile and glee in meeting a college daughter who was living in society, during her final years, made me so proud to be called her daughter, made me cry in happiness.

And it is why my Mother was so special, so understanding, and smart enough to prepare me for any lifestyle I decided to choose.
I suppose I am living the best of both worlds… in that I can live, how ever I choose.
I can be feminine, or masculine, get pretty, or dirty…Thanks to my wonderful Mother, I am me!

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The Stepford life!

If you ever got a chance to see the movie “The Stepford Wives!” you’ll get an idea where I am going with this.
Being used by your spouse, isn’t very fun, but if you think of the lifestyle, it isn’t so bad for those who want to portray a feminine persona.

The Stepford Life!

There are those times I so want to live the Stepford life! What girly girl wouldn’t?
I understand all those negative connotations about stereotypes, liberation, and equal rights.
Let’s turn the tables to allow your feminine ways, an expressive way to be girly!
Donne your favorite apron, a cute summer dress and heels…oh heck, lets get all dolled up so we can make jello salad, party punch, and horderves for the house guests you and your spouse have invited tonight for a social evening, in the parlor!

Candy Baking Fun!

Most of us would love to get up early, soak in a warm tub of lavender bath oil beads.
Dry off in softened snuggly bath towels, and sashay into our boudoir, as luxurious satiny lingerie, sexy pastel dresses, stylish curly wigs, colorful cosmetics, and flowery perfume, are at are beck and call, ready to use!
Slipping into luxurious silky, contouring, and enhancing unmentionables…”Oh my!”
Gliding nylons, clipping, hooking, and adjusting yourself into a feminine form. Picking out a favorite dress and allowing your dearest to zip you up from behind while caressing your curvy form! Oui LaLa!

Yes, girls…the Stepford life …just thinking about the total girlyness of it all, perks me up! I get so gitty just thinking about it!
There I am in the kitchen, garters straining and tugging my nylons, as I bend over to fill the dishwasher, or in the parlor, my blouse button straining as I pick up those slippers and newspaper, and spilling out of my brassiere in the process.
In these positions, wearing high heel pumps makes my behind curvy, as the slit in my skirt parts, showing peeks of lace from a virgin white slip.

The Stepford life allows me to vacuum in a back and forth motion, on the hallway carpet runner, my girdle keeps the cord from catching and runs past a slim tummy.
Long eyelashes keep the dust from entering my seductive cat like eyes.
When the bell rings, I greet the mailman in a perky fashion, and seductively know, no package or letter can hold back the folds and all that is contained inside, when I us my long feminine painted nails on my fingers, to open them.

Waiting for the mail.

The Stepford life allows me to drive a pink luxury car and every time I open the door, hints of my favorite perfume tickles my nose.
Sliding out of the seat, with my door wide open, makes me giggle to see my skirt slide up to show the lace tops of my thigh high nylons.
Shopping is another benefit as it is my job to buy the nicest things for my spouse and myself, high end purses, pretty shoes, and all the sexiest lingerie my heart desires!

Yes girls’, being a Stepford Wife has its drawbacks, but living a “Stepford Life” has its perks!
So next time your spouse asks you to empty the dishwasher, do the laundry, or mop the kitchen floor….think about doing it in the most feminine way possible for your situation.
Present yourself as a confident, beautiful and perky individual, with a wink that will seduce.
It may spark a interest in your loved one and allow you to continue to feel glamorous, gorgeous, and alluring to everyone you meet!
I think I’ll wear my silky leopard print scrunch blouse a darling necklace, my tallest high heel pumps…to clean the parlor today!

How do I look??? *wink* …good enough to lead a Stepford Life?

Want me to get you... your favorite slippers?

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I found more blogs about being and living this feminine lifestyle. If your interested, checkout…Mrs. Stepford Wife

Getting those duck to line up!

No, I not talking Taxes here, but it’s that time of season too….
I hope you getting a refund or if your smart, paying a tiny difference!

Ducks in a row

For me, getting those proverbial “Ducks In a Row” means, pre-planning a get together with friends.
You see, I have two girly events planned for February and I am hoping I can make both.

 I usually do my best, to plan for them.
The G2G usually lasts only about 5 hours but
there is a lot of planning that goes into a event like this, for me.
I just can’t do some things at a moments notice….there are a lot of logistics to consider.
Then there’s that wrench that sometimes get thrown into the mix, you usually don’t see it coming.
All you can do is be ready to go…and set your mind to do it
and be there for those whom you want to be with and who invited you.
I feel so terrible when I am invited and can’t commit to say I will be there…
…so all you can do is try your best to keep your word!

In order to get my ducks in a row, I need to do a few things.
I have to schedule a make-over for one of the parties that my cosmetologist is open,
so I did that even though its over a month out.
I can always cancel if the wrench is tossed my way, a day or two before….but, hey, I am booked! …one thing not to fret over!

I have to pre-choose my outfit, pack it nicely in my grab-n go bag, and stage it in a place where I can get it before I leave.
What to wear?
So, the pink blouse with satin bow, the purple sweater and matching skirt, formal white, pumps, flats, or boots?
Gosh, decisions, decisions…what us girls have to do to get prepared!
You want to look your best…just make the best decision you can and “Go For It!”

Once all the logistics of your essentials are finished, I usually think about what things I can do to document my experience?
I should take a camera and plan to take the time to find a themed type background to go with the G2G experience…
…maybe go early and take some selfies of yourself at a landmark in the area.
This way, when you tell the story of the day, you can add a little interesting tidbit about your day out that isn’t related but shows your down time is about having fun!

See where I am going with this????
Instead of worrying if you packed that extra pair of nylons, or a hair brush, or the right lipstick (oh, gotta take my pretty hankie!) you are planning things to do and see.
You are thinking..”OH gosh, I need a gift!”…imagine worrying about all those girly thing and you forgot to bring a gift?!?!?
So yes, having “all my ducks in a row” will allow me to enjoy my girly time with friends and feel good about myself…very important in projecting confidence and positive vibes to those who took the time to invite you in the first place!
Make your day special, go with the flow knowing you did your best, and enjoy the short time the events provides…before you know it, it’s all over and all you have is the memories…with pictures!!! *giggle*

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Happy New Year!!!

What a fun year it has been for the girl in me!

It’s gonna be impossible to top the experiences I lived this year!
And these experiences could have never happened without the help I received from all my local friends!

2014 is the year….

….I became a Transformations February Calendar Girl!! ….I was gifted a darling Transformations Calendar Girl wine glass to remember the occasion…it was the ultimate surprise and a cherished item, any girl could receive!
….I became a “PRINCESS”  on a local forum as I was “gifted” a custom title…it is very special to me!
….I joined ChiChapter and met so many local people that I now call good friends.
….I went to my first big social events, “three in all”, so fun! … Spring Fling, Glitz and Glam, and this years Halloween party, dancing and meeting even more friends.
….A lot of us local girl, got together 4 times this year for lunch at Wineberries, Girls night out at Big Shots Piano Bar, GNO at Forestview Lounge …on two separate occasions, and shopping and drinks.
….I met a good friends wife this year! …It was so nice to have the opportunity to meet her!
…and during that visit, a co-worker walked right past me and he never knew who I was…it was a thrill onto itself!
….A bought a few new outfits, some new lingerie, more jewelry, 3 vintage aprons (for my collection) and shoes!

YES, 2014 was a wonderful year!

I just want to wish all my followers here on my blog…. a Happy New Year!

May 2015 be the best year for you and your loved ones!

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